


Polis University

by rightherexx



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/F, F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-28
Updated: 2017-02-01
Packaged: 2018-09-12 23:03:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 14,371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9094636
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rightherexx/pseuds/rightherexx
Summary: Clarke and Lexa were childhood best friends but that all changed when Clarke couldn’t find Lexa on their first day of high school. The Woods family disappeared without a trace. Fast forward 5 years later and Clarke is starting her first year at Polis University, what happens when she sees a familiar face on campus.





	1. Move in day

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first story so this chapter is a short so I can see feedback before I make them longer.
> 
> I own nothing. 
> 
> Please excuse any spelling or grammar mistakes
> 
> Let me know what you think, feedback encouraged.
> 
> Enjoy!

“Clarke hurry up or we will never make it” yells Raven. Clarke rolls her eyes and walks faster to the car.

“Relax Rae, we don’t have to be there until 2 and it is only 10.”

Clarke and Raven are on their way to Polis University. They became fast friends freshman year of high school. Clarke considers Raven to be her best friend, but no one could replace her childhood best friend. Lexa. Lexa and her family lived next to the Griffen family. Jake and Abby Griffen were friends with Alex and Anna Woods before either of the girls were born. They all met in college and they remained close. When they decided to have children, the Wood’s and Griffen’s bought houses next to each other in hope that their children would also be friends. Clarke and Lexa were friends since they were babies. Their parents had playdates for the girls until they were old enough and wanted to spend time together without their parents arranging it.

They did everything together, literally everything. As they got older, the closer they became. They were excited to go to the same high school. Best friends, going to the same high school, what could be better? Thats what Clarke thought until the first day of school and Lexa was no where to be seen. Clarke remembers that day like it was yesterday.

_Clarke runs through the front door of the house crying. Jake is right there to hold her because he knew the reason for her tears. He saw the entire Woods family leave the house shortly after Clarke left for school. After a while, Clarke lifts her head off of his shoulder and looks at her dad_

_“Dad, Lexa wasn't at school. what happened?”_

_Jake could see the hurt and sadness in her eyes and it broke his heart._

_“I saw them leave, sweetheart, but they were gone before I could even ask why”_

_Clarke spent that night crying herself to sleep. That happened almost every night until she met a sarcastic yet smart brunette named Raven. They became best friends, doing everything together and after high school graduation they decided to become roommates at Polis University._

Raven drove them to Polis which was only 2 hours away from their homes in DC with traffic. After sitting in a ridiculous amount of traffic they arrived at PU at around 12:30. They parked outside their dorm and decided to go find their room before lugging their stuff.

“Clarke what room are again?”

“307 but there is an elevator, thank god”

Clarke and Raven take the elevator up to the 3rd floor where they get off to look for their room. They are living on a co-ed floor so their excited to see what boys and girls live in the surrounding rooms. Both of them are bisexual but don’t let the label define them. Taking out the key, Clarke opens the door.

The room is a small dorm fit for two people. There are 2 beds on either side of the room with a window between the beds. The beds are raised so below them is a dresser with extra space to store stuff below the bed. There is a desk at each foot of the beds and a closet on each side of the door. The only problem with the dorm is that it does not have its own bathroom, the floor has a to share bathrooms.

Clarke and Raven close their door and rush back to the car to grab their stuff. They make a few trips before everything they brought resides in their dorm. Jake and Abby will be bringing the rest of the girl’s stuff tomorrow since not everything could fit in the car. They start to unpack their stuff until its almost 2 and the need to meet downstairs for their orientation. Heading downstairs and outside the building they see groups of people standing around. They join the groups and a student holding a clipboard walks over to them.

“Hi my name is Becca and welcome to Polis University, can I have your names to check you in?”

“Griffin, Clarke”

“Reyes, Raven”

“Thank you girls, you both will be in group 1.

Hope you enjoy your time here at PU” Clarke and Raven walk over to where the group 1 sign is. They stand there for a few minutes before the tour starts.

“You ready for this, Griffen?”

“Ready as I'll ever will be, Reyes.”


	2. First Day

*Beep beep beep beep*

Clarke slams her hand on the table next to her bed hoping to shut off that awful noise. After a few failed attempts she opens her eyes and shuts off the alarm. The time reads 6am and Clarke is beginning to regret taking 8am classes. Clarke looks over at Raven, who is still peacefully sleeping, she has no idea how that girl can sleep through any noise.

Clarke decides to stay in bed a little longer and checks through her social media accounts. Once she's checked everything, she gets up and walks down the hall to go to the bathroom so she can wash her face and brush her teeth.

Coming back to the room, Raven is awake and sitting up on her bed.

“Morning roomie”

“You literally just got up, how are you so cheerful Raven”

“It’s our first day of classes, you have to be excited too”

“Oh I am excited, its just to early to show that excitement"

Walking over to her closet Clarke starts going through her clothes to pick an outfit. She wants to make a good first impression while also looking hot. She chose to wear jean shorts that fit her ass perfectly, a light blue tank top which brings out her ocean blue eyes and then to finish it off she wears her white vans. She then puts on light makeup and curls her blonde hair.

On the other side of the room Raven is getting ready for her first day. She's dressed similar to Clarke also wearing jean shorts, a black tank top and black vans. She decides to wear her hair up in a ponytail. Raven decides to put on light makeup as well.

“Rae you almost ready?”

“Yeah give me 2 more seconds then I'm done”

The two girls head out of their dorm and head to the english building where they have their first class. Clarke is a Biology major with an art minor, while Raven is an Engineering major. While they both have different majors, they've managed to take their general education classes together.

Upon entering the classroom, they choose seats next to each other near the back of the room. The desks slowly start to fill up by the time the professor enters. He writes his name on the board ‘Dr. Wallace.’ Right as the clock strikes 8, a brunette runs into the room and takes the only empty seat which is in front of Clarke.

The professor starts going through the syllabus, and Clarke and Raven are instantly bored. His monotoned voice is putting them, along with majority of the class asleep.

Dr. Wallace announces to the class that they should introduce themselves to the people sitting around them and get their contact information, in case they miss a class they can get the notes.

The brunette sitting in front of Clarke turns around and looks at them.

“Hi, I’m Octavia but you can call me O”

“Hey, I’m Clarke and this is my best friend Raven”

The three girls exchanged cell phone numbers and email addresses. They get to talking and the learn that Octavia is also a freshman and she is majoring in Criminal Justice.

“Which dorm building do live in?” Asks a very curious Raven

“I live in Arcadia hall” “Really? Thats where Clarke and I live!”

“Are you both roommates?”

“Unfortunately” Answers Clarke which earns her a slap on the arm from Raven.

“You know I'm only kidding Rae”

“Yeah I know, you love me too much”

Clarke rolls her eyes at the typical Raven response. Looking back at O,

Clarke asks  “which floor do you live on”

“I live on the 3rd floor, in room 306”

Raven and Clarke both look at each other before turning to Octavia with grins on their faces

"Its nice to meet you neighbor, we live in 307!” says a very excited Raven.

The class ends and the girls agree to meet later to have lunch in the common. Clarke and Raven sadly do not have the next 2 classes together since they are major related. Two classes stand between them and the end of their day/lunch. Clarke has into to biology and then chemistry 1 while Raven has physics 1 and then an intro lab for her physics class. Halfway through her 3rd class, Clarke feels her phone vibrate in her pocket

RaeBae (11:30): ugh this lab is too easy, its gonna be a long semester

Princess (11:32): that’s what happens when you're a genius Rae

RaeBae (11:35) : It’s okay to be jealous Griffen

Princess (11:40): In your dreams Reyes.

Princess (11:41): See you at lunch

After putting her phone away, the rest of the lecture flies by for Clarke and then she is finally done with her first day of classes. She can already tell that this is going to be a difficult semester. Pushing those thoughts aside, she goes to the common to meet Raven and Octavia.

Arriving at the common, she sees Raven and Octavia already sitting at a table. She walks over to them.

“Hey guys”

Octavia and Raven both look up at her and smile. They all decide to get sandwiches from a nearby food truck and go back to the table in the common to eat. While eating, the conversations remain light but flow naturally.

Once they are done eating, they throw their garbage in a nearby trash can and remain sitting at the table talking since they are all done talking. Clarke and Raven share stories about their high school years and Octavia listens but also tells them her own stories. They learn that Octavia has a brother name Bellamy, who is in a Frat on campus but is also two years older.

Looking around the common, Raven sees 3 very attractive yet intimidating people standing by a table near the corner of the common.

“Hey O, do you know them over there?” Octavia looks to where Raven is pointing and smiles.

Raven takes this as a yes.

“The guy is actually my boyfriend, Lincoln. The girl with the blonde hair and perfect cheekbones is his sister, and the brunette with the cold stare is his cousin.”

Hearing what they are talking about. Clarke turns her head to look and see who they are talking about. At first she sees O’s boyfriend, and then she see the blonde and by the time she looks at the 3rd person, she feels like the wind has been knocked out of her.

Standing about 50 feet away from her, is that last person she expected to see. She is so shocked her eyes are wide and her mouth is hanging open. She doesn't know how to react.

Raven sees Clarke’s reaction and she’s doesn't understand why her friend is acting like that.

“Clarke are you okay?”

Hearing Ravens voice, Clarke blinks a few times and then answers with the only word that she can think of

“LEXA?”


	3. Reunion

“LEXA?”

Lexa hears her name being called and she doesn't even need to look for the source, she knows exactly who's voice that is. Clarke Griffen. The girl who use to be her best friend. The girl who stole her heart when they were young. 

Lexa never thought she would see Clarke again. Her family had to leave 5 years ago and it was out of their control. The Woods family had to go into hiding because it was unsafe to remain in the area. Lexa, to this day, still doesn't know exactly what went down but she did know it was because of her father’s job.

Once it became safe again, the Woods family decided to move back to DC because that was home to them, it always would be. They ended up buying a house that was a few blocks away from the house they use to live in. Lexa couldn't find it in herself to go back to her old neighborhood to see if the Griffen’s still lived there. Not knowing was better than the disappoint in knowing that they weren't there anymore. Little did she know. 

Lexa decided to go to Polis University because it wasn’t far from home. Her older cousin Anya was a junior there and her cousin Lincoln was starting his freshman year, along with Lexa. She never expected Clarke to be at this school. She figured Clarke would go to some prestigious university.

After taking a deep breathe, Lexa moves her head in the direction she heard the angelic voice. There standing 50 feet away was Clarke, looking more beautiful than ever. Lexa looked into those ocean blue eyes she missed so much and she felt like the world stopped.

It felt surreal to Clarke to be looking into the forest green eyes, she never forgot. She stood there frozen not knowing what to do. Scared that if she blinked Lexa would not really be there. 

“Clarke who is that?” asks Raven. Hearing Raven, Clarke tears her eyes off Lexa and looks at Raven.

“Thats my Lexa.” Wait did she really just say her Lexa? It’s been 5 years, Lexa isn't hers anymore. The thought of this makes her sad and she looks up over towards Lexa again, only to see that Lexa is walking away. Clarke is not about to let her walk away again, so she goes after her. 

Seeing Clarke was too much for Lexa. It just brings back the pain she's felt the last few years not being around her favorite person in the world. She couldn't take it anymore so she turned to leave. She only walked a few feet before she heard that voice again.

“LEXA WAIT”

She doesn't want to stop walking but she does almost instantly. She doesn't turn back around. She doesn't know if she can face her right now. Lexa hears the footsteps getting closer so she decides to turn around. 

“Hello Clarke”

“Lexa, what are you doing here?”

“I go to school here Clarke”

“Since when? When did you get back?”

“My family and I returned about a week ago”

“Returned from where? Lexa why did you leave? Why did you leave me?” Clarke says with tears filling her eyes

Hearing this and seeing Clarke starting to cry was breaking Lexa’s heart. To know that she is the reason for her the love of her life’s tears. 

“I’m sorry Clarke, we didn't have a choice. But this is not the place to talk about this.”

Just as Clarke is about to reply, a beautiful tan girl with flowing brown hair walks up to Lexa and kisses her. 

“Hey babe, how was your first day?”

“Hey Cos, it was good but I was in the middle of a conversation.”

Lexa turns back to Clarke with her arm around the girls waste. This gives Clarke a horrible feeling in her gut. She doesn't know who this girl is or why she's making her feel this way but she doesn't like it.

Lexa informs Clarke that this is her girlfriend Costia. Clarke feels sick after hearing this news. She can’t stand to be around them right now. 

“I’m sorry.. I uh.. I gotta go, bye” Clarke leaves the common as fast as she could.

Lexa is taken back, she doesn't understand why Clarke acted like that. She was fine until Costia came up and kissed her. Costia. Was that the reason why Clarke left in a hurry. That wouldn't make any sense. Maybe Clarke had somewhere to be because there was no way Clarke was jealous. 

Later that night, Clarke was a mess. Her best friend showed back up after 5 years and she has a girlfriend. Deciding that she needs to relax, Clarke goes to take a shower. 

While showering, Clarke can’t stop thinking about why she feels so jealous about Costia. Wait jealous? She couldn’t be jealous. Lexa was her best friend, she didn't have feelings for her, or did she? No she couldn’t. She was jealous that Costia was close the Lexa, that had to be it. Clarke missed being close to Lexa and that explains why she's feeling like this.

Finishing up her shower, she wraps the towel around her body and heads back to her dorm. Walking down the hallway, she seems two people standing outside the room that is next to hers. 

Getting closer to her door she realizes it is Lexa and Costia standing outside the door. And they are making out. Again Clarke feels sick. By the time she reaches her door, Costia and Lexa have broke apart and Costia is leaving down the hallway.

Clarke looks over at Lexa and their eyes meet again. 

“Hello Clarke”

“Uhh hi Lexa”

Lexa doesn't dare move her eyes away from Clarke’s because she can see Clarke is in a towel and doesn't trust herself.

“Looks like we are neighbors again Clarke”

“I guess so. O is your roommate?”

“Yup she is, how do you know her?”

“Oh Raven and I have english with her”

“And Raven is??”

“She’s my best friend and roommate”

Hearing Clarke saying she has a new best friend, hurts Lexa but what does she expect. It has been 5 years. 

Clarke sees how Lexa reacts to hearing the words ‘best friend.’ This makes her happy. She wants Lexa to feel the pain she's felt the past years. 

Lexa can’t take it anymore, she needs to get away from Clarke. She heads into her room but not before saying bye.

“Goodnight Clarke”

“Bye Lex, see you around”

Neither one of them notice the nickname slip.


	4. The Party

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is longer than the previous ones. I hope it can hold you guys over until I can post again which should be Monday at some point.
> 
> Happy New Year!!! I hope 2017 is better year for you all.

The first week of classes finally ended and it was Friday night. Lexa spent the rest of the week actively avoiding Clarke. She didn’t know what to say to the blonde. She knew Clarke deserved to know why her family left but after seeing the hurt in Clarke’s eyes, she just couldn't do it. Not yet.

Lexa was sitting on her bed reading a book. She just wanted to relax after the stressful week. She hears the door open and she automatically knows Octavia is back.

She looks up to see Octavia looking at her wide eyed. “What is your problem?” asks an annoyed Lexa. 

“Is that what you plan on doing all night?” Lexa rolls her eyes and responds

“Actually yes, I chose to stay in because I wanted to relax”

Octavia is not okay with that answer at all. “It’s our first Friday night, we are going out. Actually were going to the party my brother’s frat is throwing”

“I’m not going to a party with a bunch of drunk guys” Lexa says in a stern tone.

“Listen commander, you're going to this party. Everyone is going and I already called your girlfriend and she is meeting us there. Get your pretty ass up and get dressed.”

A few hours later, the party was in full swing. Lexa was standing with Costia and they were talking to Anya and Lincoln. Octavia was no where to be found so Lexa assumed she was somewhere getting drinks.

Lexa hears the front door open and then cheering, she looks over to see what is happening. Clarke and Raven have arrived, both looking stunning. 

Clarke is wearing a short navy dress that hugs her perfectly and shows a generous amount of cleavage. Leaving little to the imagination. She has her hair down curled and has minimal makeup on. Raven was wear a black high wasted skirt with a red crop top. She also had her hair down but it was straight. 

Lexa is in awe but looked away before anyone could notice she was starring. She was with Costia now and had to move on from her crush on Clarke. 

Clarke and Raven enter the house where the party is and there is already a bunch of people inside and the music is blasting. Octavia guides them to the kitchen where they all get drinks. 

Moving to the living room area, they are approached by a handsome guy with shaggy hair and freckles. “Who are these beautiful ladies?”

“Bel stop. These are my friends Clarke and Raven. Guys this is my brother Bellamy”

They all exchange hellos and then O brings them over to meet her boyfriend. “Guys this is my boyfriend Lincoln, the girl next to him is his sister Anya. The broody brunette is Lexa and the girl attached to Lexa is her girlfriend Costia”

Clarke and Lexa stare at each other while Raven says hello to the rest of them. Neither one of them wants to look away but they know they have to. Looking away from Lexa, Clarke downs her drink, turns to Raven and says “lets dance.”

Clarke and Raven hit the dance floor but not before grabbing drink refills. They are both dancing together, letting loose and having fun. This is exactly what they needed after the first week from hell. Clarke is trying her hardest not to look at Lexa but her eyes always end up on the brunette. Its like a magnet Clarke can’t control.

One of the times Clarke looks over at Lexa, she and Costia are making out in the corner of the room. This gives her that funny feeling in her gut. The jealousy she feels rising in her is only getting worse the more she sees Lexa and Costia together. Realizing this, Clarke begins to think that maybe she does have some feelings for Lexa. This thought scares her and she knows exactly how to deal with it. Alcohol.

Later on that night, Lexa is drunk and wants to go home. She's spent the night looking at Clarke and drowning her feelings in alcohol. Lexa even tried to make out with her girlfriend to distract her but that didn’t even help.

Trying to find her cousins to say bye, Lincoln and Octavia are no where to be seen so she assumes they are off having sex somewhere. She walks to the makeshift dance floor to find Anya, what she finds instead makes her see red. Clarke is dancing with some blonde. Dancing is the nice way to put it. Clarke is full on grinding on this girl. Wait Lexa knows that girl, her name is Niylah, she's in some of her classes. 

Watching the scene unfold more, Niylah starts kissing Clarke’s neck. That makes Clarke turn around and start making out with Niylah. Lexa is in complete shock. She doesn’t even know what to do.

Lexa is now so angry but she has no right to feel this way. She knows this too. Clarke isn't hers, she doesn’t have any claim to Clarke. Hell they aren't even friends anymore. Plus Lexa has Costia. The girl she's been together with for 2 years. The girl she cares about.

Her mind is reeling. Clarke was dancing grinding with a girl AND she was making out with said girl. Growing up Lexa always thought Clarke was straight. She never showed any interest in girls. But now. Does this mean Lexa’s crush isn't hopeless, that she has a chance with Clarke?

Deciding she can’t watch this anymore, Lexa turns around and leaves through the front door. She finds Costia waiting for her, so she can drive Lexa back to her dorm. Lexa sends a text to both her cousins to know that she has left and she will talk to them tomorrow. 

Clarke has been enjoying her night a lot. Considering the amount of alcohol she's drank, she probably won’t even remember it. Somewhere between her 5th and 6th drink, she finds herself dancing with some blonde. She doesn't even know her name but she doesn't care. 

Dancing with this girl is the perfect distraction. She finds herself looking at Lexa a lot less often. She also finds herself imaging that the girl behind her was actually Lexa. Imaging that her ass was grinding in Lexa’s crotch and Lexa’s hot breath against her neck. Then the kissing, she wishes that the lips against hers were Lexa’s. Shit. This is not good.

Did this mean that she had feelings for Lexa? Going through how she's felt the last week, everything is adding up to look like that. Maybe she does have feelings. Shit. She can’t have feelings for her. Lexa has a girlfriend. Fuck.

Clarke stops dancing with the sudden realization. She feels herself sobering up with the thought. Turning around to the girl, “I’m sorry, I.. uh.. I need to head home.” and with that she runs out of the room. She finds raven playing beer pong with Anya. “Rae I need to go home now”

“Woah, Clarke what is wrong?”

“Uh.. I’m not feeling good. It’s only down the road so I’m going to walk”

Raven just looks at Clarke and she can see she's paler than she was before. Turning back to the game, she looks at Anya “I’m going to take her home”

Anya walks over to Raven and gives her a hug. “Okay, be safe. Text me when you get home.” Raven kisses Anya on the cheek and leaves with Clarke. 

When they arrive back at the dorm, Clarke takes off her dress and shoes, and then just crawls into her bed. Raven has only seen Clarke act like this a few times.

“Clarkey what’s going on? Raven asks Clarke carefully. She knows if she pries too much, Clarke won't open up at all.

“This is going to sound completely insane but I think I might havefeelingsforLexa” Clarke says the last part so fast hoping Raven doesn't catch it. But she does and Raven is shocked.

“Is this the alcohol talking or you? Raven says carefully walking closer towards Clarke. 

Clarke sits up and looks at Raven. She doesn't know whether she should tell Raven the truth or make up some lie. She decides to tell the truth.

“Uh.. it is me talking. I spent a lot of time thinking about why I was so jealous of Costia and its not just because she's close to Lexa. I think I’ve always had feelings for her but didn’t acknowledge them because she was my best friend. But Lexa is with Costia and even if she wasn’t, I still hate her for leaving. We would never work as girlfriends anyway.”

Raven can see the sincerity in Clarke’s eyes. “Wow Clarke. I mean it would make sense. When we first became friends the way you talked about her made it seem like you guys were more than best friends. But it’s a good idea that you move on from these feelings…”

Clarke can see that there is more Raven wants to say. “whatever it is Rae, just say it.” Raven smirks at Clarke and says “you know what they say, the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else”

Clarke shakes her head and starts laughing. This is the reason why she loves having Raven as her best friend. That girl can make every situation better. Clarke gets off her bed and walks to Raven to hug her.

“Thanks Rae, you’re the best!” Raven smiles at this and hugs Clarke back. “I know I am but you’re welcome princess”

After the conversation is done, they decide they’ve both had enough for tonight and they both head to bed. Raven texts Anya to let her know that they made it back.

Raven (1:30am): We made it back safe.  
Anya (1:35): Good, how is Clarke? Is she okay?  
Raven (1:40): Yeah she is better now, thanks for asking.  
Raven (1:41): Goodnight Anya.  
Anya (1:50): Goodnight xx

In the room next door, Lexa is laying on her bed wide awake. She can’t sleep at all. Her mind is racing. She can’t stop picturing Clarke at the party. There was one question on her mind and she couldn't stop thinking about it. Was Clarke really into girls or was she one of those straight girls who make out with other girls when they're drunk.

Lexa decides that she actually doesn't want to know the answer to the question. She doesn't think she can take more pain if it happens to be the latter. That is when Lexa makes a decision of what she needs to do. 

Lexa swears to herself that she will get over her feelings for Clarke. She has wasted enough of her time with the crush and thinking about the ‘what ifs’ . It’s about time she focuses solely on Costia. That what her girlfriend and their relationship deserves. 

Lexa promises that from this moment forward, she will be the best girlfriend she can be. For Costia.


	5. Moving on

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay. Celebrated New Years too hard and then life happened.
> 
> Hope this chapter was worth the wait.
> 
> Enjoy!

This first month of school came and went. Lexa has spent all her free time, since that party the first week, with Costia. She dedicated all her time to making sure her girlfriend was happy. This meant that she has not spent enough time with her cousins or friends. Lexa has not talked to Clarke at all during the past month. If they were in the same space, one of them would always find an excuse to leave. It was just easier this way.

It was now Friday night and Lexa was taking the night away from Costia and was just hanging out in her dorm. She hears her phone keep going off so she grabs it and sees what is happening. The group chat was going crazy.

Raven: Guys whats going on tonight? I’m bored  
Octavia: I thought you were going to dinner with Clarke  
Monty: Jasper and I are just hanging in our dorm  
Raven: She ditched me to go on a date  
Bellamy: Woah, she is on a date? With who?  
Octavia: Seriously who is she out with?  
Raven: Some guy from her bio class. He's been trying to take her out all week  
Monty: Good for her  
Raven: Can we just have a night in? Pizza and movies? My dorm in about an hour?  
Octavia: Lincoln and I will be there  
Jasper: We will be there  
Bellamy: Sounds good  
Anya: I’ll be there  
Raven: What about Lexa and Costia?  
Lexa: Costia is busy tonight and I won’t be there  
Raven: You are next door, you will be there. We haven't seen you in forever.

Lexa really did not want to go. She just wanted to stay in and relax. It had nothing to do with the fact that she would be in Clarke’s dorm while Clarke was on a date. Well she was trying to convince herself of that.  
Clarke was happy that she finally had a chance to move on. The handsome boy in her biology class has been trying to get her to go out with him all week. The first time he asked her out, they exchanged phone numbers and have been talking constantly since. She agreed to go out with him tonight and he would pick her up at 7.

Clarke was anxiously waiting for her date to pick her up. She chose to wear black skinny jeans, a flowing white tank top with white vans. Just as the clock hit 7 there was a knock at the door. Looking over at Raven, who was laying on her bed, and said “Bye Rae, I'm going out. Don't wait up” Raven just looked up at her and said “Bye have fun.” Raven was low-key mad that Clarke ditched their plans but she was happy her friend was finally moving on. She decided to text the group to try to make new plans.

Opening and walking out of the door, Clarke see her date standing there looking handsome as always. She walks up to him and hugs him. “Hey Finn” she says to him and smiling he replies “Hey Clarke, you ready to go?”

They leave the dorm building and head to Finn’s car. The head to Grounders for dinner. It’s a burger place and they've both been dying to try it. They both order burgers and fries. After they pay, they decide to walk around the local park before heading to see a movie. 

By the time that they reach the theater, all the movies are sold out. “Dammit! I’m sorry Clarke, when I checked earlier none of the movies were even close to being sold out” says Finn with a pout.

“Its okay, Finn” says Clarke with disappointed laced in her voice. “You can just take me home now”

“Aww come on Clarke don't be like that. We can do something else” Finn tries to reason.

Clarke just looks at him with a smile and says “no really it’s okay. I kind of ditched Raven for our date so it would be good to go home a little earlier” 

“Alright then, I’ll get you home” says Finn. They both start walking back to his car so they can head back to Clarke’s dorm.

Raven has spent the last 20 minutes trying to clean their dorm room. She also ordered about 6 different pizzas since all her friends will be coming over. She just finishes cleaning when there is a knock at the door. Opening it she sees that Monty, Jasper and Bellamy are the first ones to arrive.

“Hey guys, just make yourself at home. The pizza should be here soon.”

After they sit and start talking, Raven gets a text saying that the pizza guy is outside the dorm building. Grabbing her wallet, she runs out the door. She then literally runs into Anya, almost knocking the girl over. “Where is the fire Reyes?” Asks Anya with a smirk on her face. 

“Sorry, the pizza is here. Make yourself at home” says Raven over her shoulder and continues running towards the main door. She makes it downstairs, pays the pizza guy and carries struggles to carry the pizzas back to her dorm.

Making it back to her room, she sees Octavia practically dragging Lexa out of their room, with Lincoln’s help of course. “Guys just let me go” groans Lexa.

“Not a chance in hell Lexa, you’ve barely hung out with us all month” says Octavia as she continues to pull Lexa out of their doorway and towards the door next door. 

“Lincoln I’m your cousin, you should be on my damn side” Lexa says while throwing a glare at Lincoln.

“Sorry Lex, but it’s true. you haven't made any time for us”

“Ugh I know that but I’ve been trying to put Cos first for once” Lexa feels bad. She knows she should've spent more time with her friends and cousins but her relationship with Costia needed this past month. “Okay fine, stop pulling me. I’ll willingly continue walking to the door.”  
With that, Octavia and Lincoln both release their grip on Lexa’s arms. When they see Raven approaching, Lincoln automatically takes the pizza boxes from Ravens arms. “Here let me help you with that.”

“Thanks Linc” Raven says as she holds the door open for Lincoln. Lincoln puts the pizzas down on the table and says “Pizzas here, everyone dig -“ before he can even finish his sentence, everyone is rushing towards the pizza boxes. “You guys are a bunch of animals when you are hungry” Lincoln says before laughing. 

After they were all full, they are trying to decide what movie they should watch and of course none of them could agree on a genre. They finally agreed on a horror movie which happened to be Texas Chainsaw Massacre. They are all so focused on the movie that, about halfway through, they didn't hear the door open. Suddenly the light turned on and they all start screaming. 

“WHAT THE FUCK CLARKE” yells Raven after pausing the movie. Looking over to where she just walked into the room. “You just gave us all a damn heart attack.” 

Clarke just starts laughing “you guys are the one that decided to watch a movie in the pitch black, not my fault.” Up until this moment she hasn't realized that Lexa is in the room. That is until she looks around the room and her eyes lock to the green ones sitting across from her. Clarke’s eyes go wide. She hasn’t really seen Lexa in a month and she didn't expect her to be in her dorm room. 

Raven understands what is going on and she decides she needs to help. “So Clarke, how was the date?” 

Clarke rolls her eyes. Of course Raven would ask her this now. When everyone is around to here it. When Lexa is around to hear it. “Uhh it was good.”

“You don't sound confident on that, princess” Bellamy says to Clarke

“Princess?!” says Lexa out of the blue.

Lexa has been sitting there minding her own business. After the awkward eye contact she didn't want to give Clarke an excuse to look at her again so she just sat there. Quiet. She really didn't want to listen to how well Clarke’s date was but she couldn't leave without making it a big deal since she was across the room from the door. Well that was until she heard Bellamy call Clarke princess. It slipped from her mouth before she could even stop it.

“Yeah Lexa, that is her nickname” says Bellamy 

Lexa looks at Clarke and their eyes lock again before she says “I know it is, just didn’t know she still went by it” After she says that, she can see sadness in Clarke’s eyes. 

“What do you mean still? Octavia asks “Rae I thought she got it in high school?”

“I thought she did, by the time we became friends, she was already being called it” Raven says in reply. “So yeah, what do you mean still Lexa?”

“Why don’t you ask Clarle? I’m sorry I need to go” Lexa is up in a flash and heading to the door. 

Clarke finally breaks from her trance and says “Lexa wait!” this gets Lexa to stop. “Guys, Lexa is the person who came up with the nickname. It was on my 10th birthday and she was one of the only people to called me that” Her voice is shaky and laced with emotion by the time she finishes talking. 

“Oh I NEED to hear the story behind it, common Lexa tell us” begs Raven.

“Another time guys, I’m sorry. I really need to go” says Lexa as she walks out of the door. She is about to open her door when she hears “Lexa”. 

“Why do they all call you ‘princess’ Clarke? asks an angry Lexa. It was always HER nickname for Clarke. The only other person that was allowed to call Clarke that was Wells. He was their best friend (closer to Clarke) and basically like a brother neither of them had.

“They heard Raven call me it and then they just started” explains Clarke. 

“Why does Raven even call you it Clarke? What.. since I was gone, your new ‘best friend’ had to fill my place and call you the nickname I created for you?” Lexa is mad and the anger is building in her. 

“No Lexa, no that’s not it at all” Clarke manages to get out before she starts sobbing.

Lexa is taken back by Clarke crying but still needs to know why “then what is it?”

“Junior y-year of high s-school, W-Wells got into an a-accident” She says between sobs. “He.. he didn't m-make it. He d-died. He… he left me t-too.” Clarke manages to get out.

Hearing this Lexa automatically hugs Clarke and holds her close. “Shhh Clarke it’s okay.” Lexa is trying to comfort Clarke and stop her sobs.

Gripping onto Lexa like her life depends on it, she manages to tell Lexa the rest. “A-after he died, Raven s-started to call me ‘princess’. She k-knew he a-always called me it. She did it t-to comfort me. S-Since then, it has just stuck. I’m s-sorry”

Lexa’s heart is broken hearing this. “No I'm sorry Clarke, I shouldn’t have freaked out and got mad without knowing the details. I’m sorry you had to go through this and I couldn’t be there for you. I’m truly sorry. I just thought you were trying to replace me” While saying this all she has been rubbing Clarke’s back to help stop her sobs.

“I tried, but you're irreplaceable” Clarke says so low that if Lexa wasn't listening she would've missed it. Hearing this it just makes her hold Clarke closer and tighter. 

After a while, Clarke stops sobbing and they just stand there for a few minutes longer. Clarke finally pulls back from Lexa. Being held by Lexa felt nicer than it should have. Looking at Lexa, she says “Thanks Lex”

“You don’t have to thank me Clarke. This talk made me realize a lot has happened in the 5 years I’ve been gone. I think maybe we should talk about it all and catch up.”

“A lot has happened that’s for sure, but yeah I think we should talk about it. Maybe sometime next week?”

The fact that Clarke wants to talk makes Lexa smile. “Sure Clarke next week works. Anytime you’re free let me know” Opening her door, she looks back at Clarke and smiles “goodnight princess”

Clarke smiles at hearing Lexa say that and replies “goodnight commander.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updates may be slow this week. I have a lot going on but will try my hardest to post asap.


	6. Girls Day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took me so long to get this chapter up. I planned on finishing it and posting this past weekend but didn't have the free time I expected to have.
> 
> I'm going to try to get the next chapter up within the next few days.
> 
> I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Clarke takes a few moments to compose herself before walking back into her room. She knows she has to deal with the rest of them and their questions and she just really doesn't want to do it. Opening the door she walks in and everyone automatically looks at her. 

Raven gets up, walks over to Clarke and gives her a hug “are you okay” she asks? 

Clarke hugs her back and tells her “not really but I will be”

After the hug, Clarke looks over to Lincoln and Anya. They both look like they’ve seen a ghost. Wide eyes and open mouths. They are just starring at her. “Uhh guys.. what is it?”

This seems to snap Lincoln and Anya out of their trance. “you’re her” they say at the same time. 

“I’m her? I don't get what that means” Clarke asks confused.

“You’re Lexa’s princess” Lincoln says “every time I would call Lexa to make plans with her, she would always say she had plans with her princess. Even Aunt Anna and Uncle Alex always referred to you as Lexa’s princess. Until today we never knew your actual name.”

“Lincoln is right” says Anya “we never knew your name. Growing up she aways referred to you as princess and then when you guys were old enough and had phones, whenever we hung out she was texting ‘princess’. Literally never once heard your real name.”

Hearing this information shocks Clarke. She knew Lexa always called her ‘princess’ and very rarely by her name but she never thought that was what she called Clarke to everyone. The fact that Lexa referred to her as ‘her princess’, and Alex and Anna referred to Clarke as ‘Lexa’s princess’ made a bunch of different emotions rush through Clarke. She didn't know how to process this information, especially after the emotional conversation she had with Lexa not even 10 minutes prior. 

Seeing how Clarke was reacting, by not reacting at all, Raven decided that maybe she should end this little group hangout. “Uh- its getting pretty late guys, maybe we should call it a night.” 

Everyone agrees with Raven and slowly start getting all their belongings, and saying their goodbyes to Clarke and Raven. After they leave Clarke and Raven both get ready for bed and call it a night. 

The next morning Clarke wakes up and still doesn't know how to process the information she received last night. It may not be huge but to her it made her question a lot. Did Lexa have a crush on Clarke when they were younger and thats why she was known as “Lexa’s princess?” Was she referred to as her princess because they were only best friends? All these questions were plaguing Clarke’s mind. 

She decides to spend the day in bed watching Grey’s Anatomy. She didn't want to do anything and Raven was no where to be found. She was gone by the time Clarke woke up. She was probably hanging out with Anya. 

Clarke ends up falling asleep after watching about 5 episodes and wakes up when Raven comes back to the room. Checking her phone Clarke sees that she was sleeping for 2 hours.

“Hey Clarke, I’m sorry I didn’t meant to wake you up” Raven apologizes.

“Don’t worry about it Rae, I fell asleep binge watching Grey’s. I guess I needed a few more hours of sleep.” Clarke replies “where have you been all day?”

“I spent the day with Anya” Raven says with a slight smile on her face. 

“You’ve been spending a lot of time with her, what’s going on there? Clarke is curious to what’s going on with her best friend and Lexa’s cousin. 

“We’ve just been hanging out.. I- I like her, like a lot” Raven manages to get out. 

“Aww Rae! I’m so happy for you, you deserve to be with someone like her.” Clarke tells her “do you know if she feels the same?”

Raven smiles at this “I’m pretty sure she does feel the same, she's hinted at it. But we want to take things slow.”

“Slow is always okay. I really hope it works out for you” Clarke is so happy for her best friend. She hasn't seen Raven look this happy since her last relationship which was in high school. 

Deciding she's had enough talking about her and Anya’s relationship she turns the conversation towards Clarke. “Speaking of relationships, when are you going back out with Finn?”

Clarke sighs “Honestly I don’t know. The date we went on yesterday was nice but I didn’t have a lot of fun. I didn’t really feel a connection. And before you say anything, this has nothing to do with Lexa. I’m trying to move on but I don’t want to force feelings for someone to do that.”

“I wasn't going to say anything like that but I get it. If you force yourself to like Finn, it won’t be real and a relationship would never work out” says Raven.

Raven goes over to her bed and pulls out her laptop deciding she wants to binge some Netflix as well. They both are watching Netflix when both their phones start vibrating. Octavia is blowing up their group chat.

Octavia (7:05): We should have a girls day tomorrow, just us  
Octavia (7:05): It could be so much fun  
Octavia (7:06): We all need a day to relax anyway  
Octavia (7:06): We can do whatever you guys want!  
Octavia (7:06): What do you guys say?  
Raven (7:07): Sure I'm in  
Clarke (7:07): Yeah I'm in too.  
Octavia (7:08): Yay! I’ll come over tomorrow at 10 and we can start our day  
Raven (7:09): Sounds good  
Clarke (7:10): Okay, see you then

The next morning Clarke’s and Raven’s alarms both go off at 8:30am. That gives them plenty of time to shower and get ready before Octavia arrives at their door. At 10am sharp there is knocking at the door. Clarke walks over to the door and opens it. “Hey O”

“Hey guys are you ready for our girls day?” asks Octavia as she walks in the door. 

Clarke and Raven grab the things they need and the all leave the dorm building. The head to a nearby diner to have some breakfast. They sit down at the booth and wait for their waitress to come over. They are all looking at the menus that they don't hear their waitress approach the table. 

“Hey guys, I’m Costia and I’ll be your waitress today”

Hearing that, Clarke’s head shoots up along with Raven’s and Octavia’s. They are all shocked at this. 

“Oh my god! Octavia, Raven? Oh and Clarke. I didn’t realize it was you guys! How've you been?” Costia asks. 

“We’ve all been good. Just having a girls day today” Octavia answers for all of them. 

“That sounds like fun, what can I get you guys to drink?” Costia asks them all. Octavia and Clarke get waters while Raven gets chocolate milk. Costia leaves to get their drinks and Clarke decides to speak up. “Please tell me you guys heard that too?”

“Do you mean the ‘oh and Clarke’, than yes we heard it” says Raven “someone wasn't too thrilled at seeing you here.”

“I got that impression but I don't understand. I haven't done anything to her” Clarke says confused. She really hasn't don't anything to Costia.

“Maybe she knows how close you and Lexa use to be, and she's not happy that you're around again?” says Octavia trying to make sense of everything. 

Costia comes back with their drinks and takes their orders. They all end up getting pancakes and a side of bacon. The pancakes at this diner are the best around. Once Costa leaves they continue their conversation.

“Yeah maybe but that still wouldn't make sense because it’s not like were hanging out all the time like we use to when we were best friends. We barely even talk, she has no reason to not like me” Clarke says getting a little annoyed.

“Who knows, lets just forget it for now and enjoy the rest of our day” suggests Octavia. 

After another 10 minutes of waiting, Costia comes back with their food. They all eat in silence because they were so hungry they didn't care to make conversation. After they finish eating, they pay for the food and leave Costia a good tip for the sake of being nice. 

Heading back to the car, the girls then head to the spa. They are all getting a massage, a manicure and a pedicure. It is the perfect way to relax and they are all so excited.

“I can’t wait for my massage, I need to de-stress bad” Clarke says

“I cant wait either, I’ve never had a massage before” Octavia agrees.

They spend the next 4 hours at the spa getting pampered and relaxing. By the time they leave the spa they are all completely relaxed but starving. Octavia suggest they go to Grounders for dinner. 

Hearing the suggestion, Clarke gets so excited “Oh my god, the food there is SO good. Finn took me there the other night.”

That is all they needed to hear to definitely go to Grounders. They all order burgers and fries when they get there. While they are eating Clarke decides to ask a question thats been bugging her all day. “O, how was Lexa last night when you went back to your room?”

Octavia finishes chewing and looks at Clarke. She can see the worry in Clarke’s eyes. “She didn't really say much to me at all. She was quiet and was basically in bed by the time I got back to the room. When I woke up this morning she was gone. Why do you ask?”

“I’ve just been worried. I dropped the bomb on her last night that our good friend growing up passed away. I could see the anger, sadness and regret in her eyes. I just- I- I don't want her to beat herself up over it. She couldn't control it.” Clarke says slowly. 

“Maybe you guys can talk about it, since you really do need to talk and stop avoiding each other” Raven comments. 

Clarke sighs “I know, we agreed to meet this week and talk about the past 5 years. A lot has happened in both our lives and we need to get it all out”

“Good hopefully you can talk it all out and stop avoiding each other. It would be better for the group dynamic, just saying” says Octavia. 

They all finish their food and pay the bill. Deciding that they've done enough for today they all head back to the dorm. 

“This was a great idea O, we all really needed this day” Raven says.

“Yeah it was a really great day, I love you both” says Clarke.

“Aw we love you too Clarkey” Octavia teases.

“Fuck, not you too? Clarkey really?” Clarke says annoyed but with a slight smile on her face.

“Yeah I decided to hold back on the whole ‘princess’ nickname and Raven suggested I call you Clarkey like she does” Octavia tells her.

They all say goodnight to each other and head into their rooms. Clarke and Raven decide to watch a movie before bed. It just happened to be the ‘The Last Song’ which was one of the best romantic movies. There is definitely some sadness in the movie but the relationship between Ronnie and Will ends up being really beautiful by the end of the movie.

After the movie ends, both Raven and Clarke go to bed. Clarke can’t sleep. The whole Costia thing from earlier is bothering her. She wants answers. No she needs answers. Eventually sleep finally comes to her.

The last thought on her mind is that she hopes her and Lexa can talk this week.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone has any ideas of what they would like to see happen let me know!


	7. Regret

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a continuation from chapter 5 but from Lexa's side.
> 
> Enjoy!

After walking into her room, Lexa closed the door and leaned against it. Closing her eyes, she took multiple deep breaths to try to calm herself. She could not believe what Clarke just told her. Not only did Lexa have to leave Clarke but Wells, he left Clarke too. Clarke had to finish high school without either of her childhood best friends next to her. The thought of this pained Lexa.

She didn't know how to process all this information. She decides to lay in bed and hopes sleep will come to her. Unfortunately it doesn’t. She lays there wide away with thousands of thoughts and emotions rushing through her.

She hears the door open and she knows that Octavia is back. She lays still to try and make Octavia think she was asleep but it doesn't work because Octavia starts to talk to her “Lexa, are you awake?”

“Yeah, O I am” answers Lexa

“Are you okay? I don’t know exactly what you and Clarke talked about in the hall but I saw how Clarke was after and I wanted to check on you”

Hearing this Lexa sits up. How Clarke was after? “I will be okay and what do you mean how Clarke was after?”

“Well I could tell she has been crying and she just seemed sad” Octavia tells her

“We had an emotional conversation that I don’t think either of us were really prepared for” Lexa tells Octavia without giving too much away.

Octavia accepts that answer and gets ready for bed. Soon both the girls are trying to fall asleep. Lexa can hear soft snores and can tell Octavia is already sleeping. Lexa wishes she could sleep but it seems nearly impossible right now. Grabbing her phone she sees that she has a text from her girlfriend. 

Cos (10:05): Hey baby, I hope you had a good night.  
Lexa (11:15): Sorry babe I just got this. I hope you had a good night too  
Cos (11:20): It’s okay, come over tomorrow morning?  
Lexa (11:22): Of course, I’ll be there early since I know you have work  
Cos (11:30): Sounds good, Goodnight baby I love you  
Lexa (11:36): Goodnight, love you too

Setting her phone back down, she tries to sleep. Eventually she does and she sleeps for a few hours. When Lexa wakes up again she checks the time and sees that its 4:30 in the morning. Knowing that she won’t be able to sleep anymore, Lexa gets up and decides to go for a nice long run.

Quietly she gets up and changes into her workout gear. She doesn't want to wake up Octavia. Leaving the dorm building Lexa sets off to do an 8 mile run. After her run she gets back to the dorm so that she can shower before heading to Costia’s place. 

Once she is showered and dressed, Lexa sends a text to Costia to let her know that she is heading over there.

Lexa (6:30): Good morning babe, I’m going to be heading to your place. See you soon.

After sending the text, Lexa quietly leaves her dorm room. Making her way to her car, she heads off to Costia’s apartment. Since its early, she hits no traffic and manages to get to her girlfriend’s apartment in 20 minutes. Lexa parks outside the apartment building and checks her phone seeing she has a text from Costia.

Cos (6:45): Morning baby. I’ll see you when you get here.

Lexa texts her back to let her know that she is here.

Lexa (6:51): I’m here  
Cos (6:52): Okay come up, the door is unlocked  
Lexa (6:52): Be right there 

Getting out of her car Lexa heads up to the apartment building. She uses the key Costia gave her to open the front door and heads up the stairs. Reaching the 2nd floor, she walks to her girlfriends apartment and opens the front door. She hasn’t even stepped through the threshold before Costia runs up to her and pulls her into a tight hug. 

Costia notices that Lexa doesn't react like she normally does. She immediately knows that something is bothering her girlfriend. She pulls back and looks at Lexa’s face. It is showing no emotion, per usual, so now she has no idea what is wrong with her girlfriend so she decides to ask. “Baby, what’s wrong?”

Shutting the door, Lexa heads over to the couch and sit down. “It’s nothing babe.”

Costia doesn't believe her at all “Clearly something is bothering you” she says after sitting down on the couch next to Lexa.

“I just don’t want to talk about it right now” Lexa says to her

Costia is starting to get annoyed now. Lexa never wants to talk about her feelings. She knows exactly what this is about. Her girlfriend has been acting weird ever since she had a run in with a ghost from her past. “This is about her isn't it?”

Lexa has no idea who her girlfriend is talking about. “Who are you even talking about Cos?”

“Clarke” Costia says with no emotion in her voice “You’ve been acting different ever since you ran into her on campus. I’m guessing how your acting right now has to do with her.”

“I have not been acting different” Lexa defends herself.

“Yes you have Lexa. Did you think I wouldn't notice? How we suddenly started spending more time together after you saw her. You're using this relationship to avoid her because you're still in love with her. Admit it Lexa” 

Lexa doesn't know how to respond to this but she getting mad of what her girlfriend is accusing her of, even if its partly right “I am not in love with her. We started spending more time together Cos because our relationship needed it”

Costia sighs “Our relationship did need it Lexa but right now were backtracking on all the progress we’ve made. You need to talk to me about how you’re feeling for our relationship to work.

Lexa knows this is true, she just doesn't know how to do it. The only person she was ever able to talk to about her feelings was Clarke. But when her family had to leave, she stopped talking about her feelings all together. Lexa loves Costia so she knows she needs to open up.

Lexa looks up at her girlfriend and sighs. “Last night I found out one of my childhood best friends died junior year of high school. I couldn't be there for his father, for my friends. I had no choice. It eating me alive because something huge happened and I couldn't be there.”

“You mean you couldn't be there for Clarke and that’s what you feel bad about” Costia says in reply.

Lexa is taken back by that, she didn't want sympathy but her girlfriend didn't even try to comfort her. She takes a deep breathe before answering.

“Of course I feel bad about that!” Lexa yells “She became my best friend the day she was born. Our parents always had us around each other until we were old enough to choose that we wanted to hangout with each other. She was the only true friend I had growing up until we met Wells in the 5th grade. We were best friends and when my family had to leave, a part of me was okay because I knew that she still had Wells. Wells would be there for her throughout high school, while I couldn't be. I knew that Clarke would have one of her best friends there with her when she walked across that stage and received her diploma. But last night- last night I found out that she had to walk across that stage without either of her childhood best friends there, cheering for her. So yes I feel bad I couldn’t be there for my childhood best friend when she needed me the most. And I know I had no control of the situation, I know I couldn't be there because it was unsafe but it doesn’t change how I feel now. I regret it”

By the time Lexa finishes explaining it to Costia, she is crying sobbing. Hearing that confession and seeing Lexa cry, Costia is stunned. The two years they have been together, Costia has never seen Lexa cry. She feels bad.

“Baby I’m so sorry. I thought you were in love with Clarke, I didn’t know that you guys were best friends basically your entire life. That explains everything. I am so sorry, I really am” Costia hugs Lexa as tight as she can and just holds her.

After a few minutes, Lexa stops crying completely and the emotion is gone from her face. “Thats because we never talked about it. Every time, in the past, that I would try to tell you about it, you would always shut me down”

“I’m sorry Lexa, I always thought she was more to you than a best friend so I never wanted to hear about her. I really am sorry” Costia tries to convince Lexa. 

Lexa just sighs hearing this. This is the most her and Costia have communicated, feelings wise, during their entire relationship. Deciding that she doesn't want to deal with this anymore, Lexa tells her girlfriend that it’s okay and she forgives her, and they move on from the conversation.

They deicide to watch a movie during the remaining time they have before Costia has to go to work. Costia can’t stop thinking about how Clarke can evoke such emotion from her girlfriend , while Costia can’t get Lexa to open up even just a little bit. Costia decides right then and there that she hates Clarke Griffin. She now has to do everything in her power to keep Lexa from Clarke because she knows that if they get close again, she will lose Lexa.

The movie ends just in time for Costia to leave for work. They say their goodbyes and Lexa goes to her car to head back to the door, while Costia leaves for her shift at the diner. 

Lexa gets back to her door and lays on her bed. The conversation she had with Costia left her both physically and mentally exhausted. It felt good to get her feelings out about Wells death and how she feels knowing Clarke had to go through it alone. 

Lexa decides to take a nap but before sleep comes to her, the final thought she has is that she hopes her and Clarke will be able to talk this week.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope that showed you guys why Costia acted they way she did towards Clarke in the previous chapter.
> 
> Halloween will be happening soon, anyone have an couple costume ideas they would like to share??
> 
> Thanks for reading! xx
> 
> Tumblr - righthererightnowx


	8. Halloween

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter!
> 
> I'm sure a lot of you will be happy after reading it.
> 
> Also shoutout to commenter: C - They gave me some great ideas for this chapter which helped make it better!

The closer it got to Halloween, the busier everyone got. All the professors were trying to get the firsts out of the way. The first test, paper, project etc. This left the group very little time to hangout because they were always busy studying or doing their assignments. This also meant that Clarke and Lexa have yet to find a time in which they were both free so that they could have their talk. 

The day had finally arrived. Halloween. Clarke was so thankful the day finally came. All she wanted to do was finally relax. She’s spent the last few weeks actively avoiding Finn while also suffering through all her assignments and studying for all her tests. Walking out of her last class, she starts to head to the common. She’s meeting the group there for lunch.

Went she enters the common she can see the entire group is there eating. Raven, Octavia, Bellamy, Jasper, Monty, Anya, Lincoln, Lexa and Costia are all sitting around the tables. Great Costia. Now Clarke has to deal with her again. Thankfully there is a seat between Raven and Octavia that she knows is being saved for her. 

Walking over to the seat she sits down and Raven automatically passes her a container that Clarke knows has her lunch in it. Raven said she would pick Clarke up some lunch. Opening the container she sees a burger and fries waiting for her. She immediately takes a bite. God was she starving.

“Damn Clarkey, you hungry?” Raven jokes

Clarke finishes chewing before speaking “I had back to back classes since 8am, so I haven’t been able to eat anything”

The entire group continues eating their lunch. Once they are all done Bellamy makes an announcement to everyone “as you all know tonight is the frats annual halloween party. Since today is a Friday, its going to be crazy since no one has class tomorrow. Now a reminder on costumes, you HAVE to wear one in order to get in. Couples are encouraged to do couple costumes. Again the theme this year is: favorite childhood costume. Yes we want you to dress up as your favorite costume you wore as a child”

Hearing this Clarke’s eyes automatically meet Lexa’s. Lexa may have been sitting on the other side of the group but it didn't stop their eyes. They both shared a small smile before looking elsewhere. Growing up Clarke and Lexa LOVED dressing up for Halloween. They would go all out. No detail would be missed. They wore spot on costumes every year, until Lexa left. That changed Halloween for them both.

Costia caught onto the stare and the small smile her girlfriend shared with Clarke. This was not good. She knew exactly what she had to do. “Baby, we should totally do a couple costume”

Lexa looks over a Costia and smiles “uh sorry Cos, I already have a costume planned out”

Costia was not happy hearing this “But Bellamy just said they encourage couples to do couple costumes”

Lexa just looked at Costia. She didn't get what the big deal was. It was only a Halloween party. “I already bought stuff for my costume. I can’t change it now considering the party is tonight”

“Whatever, I have to go” Costia says while getting up and storming out of the common.

“Damn trouble in paradise?” Raven asks Lexa.

Lexa sighs “the last few weeks we’ve been fighting over everything. She constantly has an attitude or a problem with something. Honestly I'm getting sick of it, I feel like I'm the only one putting effort in anymore”

“Sorry to tell you this Lex but sounds like it’s time to end things with her, she’s dead weight anyway” Anya decides to tell her cousin the truth

“Anya, she's not dead weight. But honestly I’ve been thinking about breaking up with her for a while now” Lexa tells her cousin “I have to go to class now, I’ll see you all at the party tonight, bye guys”

There is a chorus of ‘byes’ from the group. Once Lexa is out of sight, the all turn and look at Clarke. “Why are you all looking at me?” questions Clarke.

“Come on Clarke. Lexa just said she wants to break up with Costia. You have to be happy about that” Raven says to her.

After their girls day, they informed Anya, Lincoln and the boys what how Costia reacted to Clarke. 

“Why should I happy that my ex best friend is unhappy with her girlfriend who happens to be a bitch” Clarke questions

“Uhm because once she’s single, you can make you move” Raven jokes

“I don’t want to make a move on Lexa. I’m still mad at her nor do I want to be with her like that. Sorry I have to go, need to finish getting stuff for my costume tonight. See you guys later” Clarke says before getting up and leaving the common.

“She is in denial. She has feelings for Lexa but is too blinded by her anger to see it” Octavia says after Clarke leaves

They all agree with what Octavia said. They hang around for a few more minutes before splitting off. They all tell each other that they will see them at the party. 

It is currently 7pm and Lexa is getting dressed in her costume. The party is starting sometime between 8-9. Bellamy said their starting early to get as much partying in before midnight comes and Halloween is over.

Growing up Lexa was always really into halloween and dressing up. She has Clarke to thank for that. Every year Clarke would want to dress up completely and then in turn Lexa would too. Though once her family left, she stopped being into Halloween. This is the first year she’s dressed up since she left before high school. 

Lexa was dressing up as Jack Sparrow for this party. Growing up she LOVED the Pirates of the Caribbean movies. She loved it so much that one Halloween Clarke bought her a Jack Sparrow costume and it was the best day of her life. That Halloween Clarke told Lexa that she had to act like him all night. Lexa did it very successfully because she loved looking at the smile Clarke would give her whenever she acted the part perfecty. 

Lexa chose to dress up as Jack Sparrow for tonight because it was truly her favorite costume as a child but also because it was the first halloween, in years, that she’s gonna spend around Clarke.

After putting the final touches on her costume, she hears a knock on the door. Opening it up she sees that it’s her girlfriend at the door. Costia is dressed up as a slutty devil. Horns and everything. How fitting, Lexa thinks to herself. After shutting the door she says “hey Cos”

“What the fuck are you dressed as Lexa?” Costia asks disgustedly 

“Uhm Jack Sparrow, from Pirates of the Caribbean” Lexa tells her

“You chose THAT over a couple costume? Unbelievable” Costia says with attitude.

“THIS happens to be my favorite childhood costume. From one of my favorite movie series” Lexa is getting annoyed now. 

Hearing this Costia rolls her eyes “well it’s stupid”

Lexa has had enough of Costia and her attitude “You wanna know what’s actually stupid, pretending that I’m still happy in this relationship when I’m not” Lexa can’t believe she just said that. She takes a deep breath before continuing “I can’t do this anymore Cos, I’m sorry, it’s over between us”

Costia is shocked hearing this “Are you really breaking up with me? What because you have Clarke now?” 

Lexa rolls her eyes. Of course she would say that. “I am breaking up with you and it has NOTHING to do with Clarke. It has everything to do with your attitude lately. You’re always pissed off or annoyed and I'm sick of being the punching bag. All we’ve been doing lately is fighting and it needs to stop. I’m sorry. We’re done”

“Whatever Lexa, you’re gonna realize what you just lost and you’re gonna miss me” Costia says. She walks over to the door, opens it and then slams it shut behind her. Lexa sits down on her bed and takes a few deep breaths. 

Clarke, Raven and Octavia were almost completely ready for the party when they heard a door slam. “What the hell?” Clarke questions

Raven runs over to the door and opens it. She looks down the hallway and sees Costia retreating to the staircase. Closing the door she turns to her friends “I’m guessing Lexa and Costia had another fight because Costia was just angrily walking down the hallway”

“Lets finish getting ready and then I’ll go see if Lexa is okay. Then we all can head to the party” Octavia suggests

They all agree and finish getting ready. Octavia was dressed as Jane, she and Lincoln were doing a couple costume so Lincoln was gonna be dressed as Tarzan. Raven was dressed as Pocahontas, it was her favorite movie growing up. Finally Clarke was dressed as Britney Spears in the school girl outfit like Britney wore in the Baby One More Time video.

Clarke chose to dress up as Britney spears because it reminded her of her favorite halloween as a child, and it was the first Halloween, in years, that she's gonna spend around Lexa. Years ago there was a Halloween were Clarke surprised Lexa with a costume of her favorite movie character, Jack Sparrow, and in return Lexa chose what Clarke had to be that Halloween. Lexa chose their favorite music artist at the time, Britney Spears. That entire night, they both had to act as their costumes. It was one of the best nights they ever had.

Once they're all ready, Octavia walks over to her room and opens the door to find Lexa isn't there. She walks next door to get Clarke and Raven. “She’s not there, she must be heading to the party already, lets go bitches!”

They leave the dorm and head to the party. By the time they get there, the party is in full swing. The music is blasting and there is people everywhere. Walking in the front door, they are greeted by Bellamy. He’s dressed as a cop. “Happy Halloween! Come in and have fun. The rest of the group is in the kitchen getting drinks” Bellamy tells them.

The girls head to the kitchen to see that everyone is there. Anya is dressed as a firefighter. Lincoln is dressed as Tarzan, like he promised Octavia. Jasper and monty did a friend costume, since they’re not a couple. Jasper is dressed as Shaggy while Monty is dressed as Scooby. 

When Clarke sees Lexa, she freezes which in turns has Raven walking straight into Clarke. “Ow! What the fuck, Griffen?” Raven exclaims.

Hearing Raven, Lexa looks up to see what that was about. She sees Clarke and her mouth drops. Their friends see them starring at each other and decide to leave them alone and go enjoy the party. 

Snapping out of her trance, Clarke walks over to Lexa. “Looks like great minds think alike, Woods” Clarke says to her. 

“Looks like it, Griffin” Lexa says giving her a smile. “Why are you looking at me like that?” she asks Clarke after she sees a mischievous glint in Clarke’s eyes.

“What do you think about this. All night, we act as our characters” Clarke suggest with a smile

“You’re on Griffin, lets do this!” Lexa agrees

They both grab drinks and go on their separate ways. Clarke goes to find Raven and Lexa goes to find Anya. 

The next few hours fly by. Between drinking, dancing and playing games, everyone was very drunk. Clarke decides she wants to get some air so she head for the back door. Walking out the door, she sees someone is already sitting on the swing she wanted to sit on. Damn. She goes over and sees Lexa is that someone. She decides to sit next to Lexa. She’s so drunk that she actually stumbles onto the swing which causes an equally drunk Lexa to start laughing.

Once the laughter dies down, they sit in comfortable silence for a while. They’ve always been able to sit around each other in silence and it has always been comfortable. Shortly after Lexa speaks up “I broke up with Costia”

“I’m sorry Lex, are you okay?” Clarke asks sincerely 

“Honestly I am in a way, it’s been a long time coming, but it feels weird that its over. We were together for 2 years”

“It will be okay Lex” Clarke tells her. Deciding she wants to change the topic for Lexa’s sake, she says “You played a good Jack Sparrow, Woods. I think it was better than it was when we were younger”

“You think so?” Lexa smiles at this “You did a good job being Britney too, Griffin. Yours was also better than when we were young”

They both smile at each other before they fall silent again. Nothing needs to be said, thats until Lexa can hear/feel Clarke shivering.

“Do you want to go inside? You’re shivering” Lexa asks

“No it’s okay, I’m fine” Clarke tries to convince her

“No you’re not here” Lexa says standing up, taking her jacket off and handing it to Clarke

“No Lex, it’s okay. I don't want you to be cold” Clarke tries to convince again.

“I’m wearing a long sleeve shirt. I also wearing a lot more clothes than you. So take it” Lexa says

Clarke takes the jacket and puts it on before sitting down again next to Lexa. “Thanks Lex” she says to her. 

Lexa smiles and says “you’re welcome Clarke”

Lexa is about to speak again, telling Clarke they need to talk soon. But she can’t say anything because a drunk Raven makes an appearance. 

“Clarkeyyyyyy, we are heading home now” Raven slurs

Clarke gets up from the swing and turns to Lexa “Goodnight Lex, we will talk soon” she smiles and starts to walk away.

“Goodbye princess” Lexa says to Clarke as she walks away. Clarke smiles at hearing the nickname. Lexa is a little taken back at how Clarke said they will talk soon. It’s like Clarke knew that she was thinking that. Getting up from the swing herself, she goes to find Anya so they can leave. 

She finds Anya in the kitchen, and says she's ready to head home. “Oh you finally dropped that pirate act? About damn time” Anya says to Lexa.

“I was acting like Jack Sparrow, Anya. Clarke and I made a deal that we had to act like our costume characters” Lexa informs Anya.

“Oh you and Clarke? That must be nice” Anya says 

“Yeah it is, it feels refreshing” Lexa agrees

They both leave and Lexa goes to her dorm while Anya goes to her dorm in a nearby building. Octavia is already in bed by the time Lexa gets to her room.

After changing, taking all her makeup and fake facial hair off, she crawls into bed. She has a smile on her face. She knows her and Clarke still need to talk, badly, but she feels like tonight was a small step. A small step towards getting her best friend back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My semester starts tomorrow so updates may be slower. It's my last semester before I graduate so it's an important one. I'll try my hardest.
> 
> I LOVE reading all your comments!!
> 
> Thanks for reading! xx
> 
> Tumblr - righthererightnowx


	9. Friendship

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally an update!! I'm really sorry, I haven't had a free moment to write between school and work. Who knew my last semester would be the hardest/busiest. 
> 
> This chapter is short but I wanted to give you guys something since it's been so long. I'm sorry for any grammar or spelling mistakes.
> 
> Enjoy!

The next morning Clarke woke up hungover and questioning, yet again, why she drank so much. Clarke was laying in her bed thinking about last night. Her head was pounding from her hangover but she couldn’t stop thinking about it. She and Lexa had a moment and it felt like those 5 years didn't happen. It felt normal to be around her and that scared Clarke.

Clarke’s thoughts were disrupted when she heard Raven moan in pain on the other side of the room. Looking over she saw Raven starting to wake up and squinting her eyes.  
Raven looks over at Clarke 

“Fuck, why did we drink so much? she asks Clarke in a whisper.

“Ugh, I don’t know” Clarke says back.

Both Clarke and Raven decided to go to the showers in hope of making themselves feel better. They ended up getting sick the moment they walked into the bathrooms. So the shower afterwords definitely helped. After they were showered and changed they both decided they needed some more sleep to get rid of the hangover.

A few hours earlier Clarke wakes up to the smell of food and sits up. Raven was awake as well and holding take out containers. Raven notices Clarke has woken up and turns to look at her. 

“I thought we would need food, so I ordered takeout” Raven tells her

“Rae you are the best! What did you get?” Clarke asks 

“Chinese. One of the best hangover foods!” Raven exclaims 

They both start eating their food when Raven decides to break the silence.

“Last night when I came to get you to go home, were you really with Lexa or was I just really drunk” Raven asks 

Hearing this Clarke just laughs a bit “Raven you were really drunk, but I was with Lexa” 

“That’s a change of events, how’d that happen?” asks Raven

“I wanted some air and went to go on the swing but someone was already on it, and when I noticed it was Lexa I just kind of sat down next to her” Clarke explains

Raven rolls her eyes at Clarke’s answer “I need more details than that Griffin” 

“We just talked Rae. She told me that her and Costia broke up. Then we had some light conversation. It wasn't much but it felt nice” Clarke ends with a smile on her face

“What do you mean it felt nice?” Raven curious as to what her best friend is talking about

Clarke runs a hand through her hand before answering “It just felt normal. Like all the years apart never happened. It wasn't awkward. The conversation just flowed. She was the Lexa that use to be my best friend. She wasn't the Lexa that I've seen the past few months”

Raven smiles after hearing this and nods her head. “So what does this mean then?”

Clarke shrugs “I honestly don’t know”

Raven could see that question deflated the good mood her best friend was in. She decides to ask a, hopefully, better question “well what do you want it to mean?”

“I want it to mean that we can be friends again. I know we probably won’t be best friends like we use to be, but I want her back in my life. Last night proved we have a rare connection with each other. I’m ready to talk to her and get everything out” Clarke answers honestly

Raven smiles, she's really happy to hear that answer from Clarke. She can see the light in Clarke’s eyes as she talks about Lexa now. This was something she hasn't really ever seen in Clarke before. “Maybe you should tell Lexa this” Raven suggests

Clarke thinks that is a good idea. She decides she should tell Lexa now that they need to finally sit down and talk. So she gets up and heads to the room next door. Clarke knocks on the door twice. An exhausted looking Lexa opens the door and is shocked to see Clarke standing there.

“H-hey Clarke” Lexa says shakily

“Hey Lexa. How are you feeling?” Clarke asks

“I’m a lot better than I was this morning” Lexa says

Clarke laughs “I understand that. Raven and I had a rough morning. We’ve basically slept all day to get rid of the hangover”

Lexa smiles at that. She doesn't really understand why Clarke is standing at her door. Clarke can see Lexa is a little confused so she decides to just straight up with her. 

“Lexa, I really enjoyed our talk last night. To me, it felt like all that time never happened… it felt normal for us to be sitting there talking. I don't know if you-“

“It felt the same to me Clarke. It felt way more normal than I ever expected it to. It truly did feel like no time has passed” Lexa says interrupting Clarke

“I’m glad I’m not the only one” Clarke laughs “I think we should find a time that works for us both so we can sit down and just talk about everything”

“Clarke, that sounds like a great idea” Lexa agrees “What about tomorrow? We can get lunch or something and just talk? She suggests 

“Sounds like a plan, we can go to Grounders” Clarke smiles 

“I’ve been wanting to go there again so I’m down. I have some stuff I need to do in the morning so can we meet there? Noon-ish?” Lexa asks

“Sure that works” Clarke says “I’ll see you tomorrow then, bye Lexa” Clarke smiles at Lexa as she turns to go head back to her room. 

“Bye Clarke, see you tomorrow” Lexa says before shutting her door. 

Clarke walks back into her room and Raven looks up at her with a look on her face that says ‘well?’

“We’re meeting at Grounders tomorrow at noon, we’re gonna grab lunch and talk” Clarke informs Raven.

“Good, I’m glad you guys finally decided to have this talk. You both need it” Raven tells Clarke.

“We really do” Clarke agrees “Now how about we binge some Greys Anatomy” 

Raven instantly agrees to that and they both sit on Clarke bed and watches the show on her laptop. Clarke was trying to focus on what was happening on the screen but she was too distracted. Tomorrow she was going to find out everything. Mainly she was finally going to find out why Lexa and her family left suddenly a few years back. This made Clarke nervous because she had no idea what was going to be said. She just had hope that tomorrow will be the first step towards Lexa becoming her friend again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will be a big one. I hope it get it up in the next week or two but I can't promise anything. 
> 
> Give me some ideas of what you want to see happen during and/or after the talk! 
> 
> Thanks for reading! xx
> 
> Tumblr - righthererightnowx


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